The baby came, but the sex went…

February 26, 2019

Rekindling your sex life after pregnancy

They say everything changes when you have a baby; your sleeping schedule, your day-to-day responsibilities, your priorities, your body—and that definitely includes your sex life. While some new moms may feel ready to jump back into the sheets, others may be hesitant, and that’s perfectly normal. You’re tired; you’re constantly busy with your baby and still do not have your pre-pregnancy body back, so it is not surprising that you do not feel like having sex. In fact, experts say that post-pregnancy can often be a time of mixed emotions when it comes to sex. The bodily and hormonal changes that occur can dampen a woman’s desire to have sex. So do not feel guilty about it. There are millions of women globally going through the same thing. And, as always Divas Inc has all the solutions.

First and foremost, give yourself time. Allow your body to heal; thinking that your vagina will be ready for sex after the trauma of delivering a baby is obviously not realistic. It is often recommended to delay having full intercourse until your post-natal check up by your doctor or midwife about 6 weeks after giving birth. Although some women are ready to make love before the 6 weeks period, it can take others 6 months depending on one’s body.

Pelvic exercises are essential so even though you are not feeling up to love making, do not neglect them. After giving birth, it is common for women to have enlarged inner walls, a loose vulva or a half open vagina, pelvic exercises help to tighten your vaginal walls. This leads to increased sensitivity during sex and stronger orgasms. Pelvic exercises are quiet easy:

  • Sit, stand or lie in a comfortable position.
  • Squeeze and lift your pelvic floor muscles.
  • Hold this contraction for up to 10 seconds then relax for a few seconds.


For best results, do three to four sets of 10 contractions every day. Some people notice changes in 4-6 weeks; however a major change is often experienced after 3 months. If you have pain or discomfort when doing normal tasks or exercise, it may be wise to consult your OB-GYN before attempting intercourse. When your doctor has cleared you to resume sex, here are a few positions you can try…


Lying side by side, or spooning is perfect for shallow penetration, which is an easy way to gauge how much you’re ready for after a vaginal delivery. It allows you to control the speed and depth of penetration so that sex is more comfortable and enjoyable.

Woman on top

The woman on top position also allows you to control the speed and depth of penetration.  It is great for women who underwent a C-section since it doesn’t put any pressure on the abdomen, thus protects the scar.

Sex on the chair

This position is great since it not only relieves pressure from your perineum or abdomen, and also lets you be in control, just like the woman on top.

Avoid positions whereby you cannot control the rate and depth of penetration which can sometimes be painful. These include all the rear-entry position such as doggy-style,the happy scissors, bent over a counter or the frisky flip. Note that rear-entry positions put a lot of pressure on the perineum therefore are not recommended for women who had tearing. Although missionary can be rewarding, it can pull your stitches if you had a C-section due to the pelvic thrust action.

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